Tuesday, January 10, 2012

on the four chord summer

I still remember the first time we met.  My family had just moved to Scudder Place from Vernon Valley and Kevin lived around the block.  It wasn't long before he became friends with my brother and before I decided that we should be in love.  I gave it time though, I was realistic, I was still in elementary school.  I'd let it develop slowly.

But by the time I was fourteen I was pretty sure that a foundation had been established.  There was a camping trip that summer before I started high school and he left for college.  There was a hike up to a pristine lake (ignore the fact that my Dad was with us).  There was a photo of just the two of us in front of that lake (ignore the fact that my Dad was behind the camera).  I wasn't naive, I knew he would still think of me as the kid sister, but I imagined him coming home at some point during that first year of college and realizing that I had grown up (because wouldn't high school mean I would instantly become sophisticated, gorgeous, braces-less and mature?).  There would be a big dramatic reveal as he approached our house.  Preferably with a great soundtrack and good lighting.

It didn't happen that way.  What I had yet to realize in 1994 was that my life was not going to mirror the 110 minute coming of age romance movie.  I'm pretty sure that's for the best (Mike, Kevin's wife and two kids would probably agree).  But there are times when I look at this photo and remember how sure I was.  I wrote this song in 2003 and the fact that I have not written a song since should let you know that I do not consider myself a song writer, but this is for Kevin.  For being so sure for so long and then for growing up and out of it.  I could not have asked for a better first* unrequited love. 

* "first" because there would be oh so many more unrequiteds to come along after...


  1. HOLY ..... Caitlin ... speechless. Your voice...

  2. I recorded this the other night while sitting on the edge of the bathtub (the only space in the apartment where I thought the neighbors might not hear me) so it's not the best musical performance ever, but thank you.